An independent reference about technology for older relatives. We are not a bank, a phone carrier or a support service, and we are not connected with the former site on this domain.
Guides
Helping an older person with technology is rarely a matter of setting everything up once and heading home. It's more like calm preparation: larger text, a clear home screen, family on quick-dial and a cheat sheet they can go back to without you. Below are guides for the most common tasks. Menu items have different names on different phones, but the idea behind them is almost always the same.
Do it with them, not for them: that way the skill stays with them, not in your head.
How to use this section: we describe what to look for, not exactly where to tap. Setting names depend on the device and system version, so look for them in your phone's settings, in the accessibility section, or with the search bar in settings. Before changing anything, ask the person whether it works for them.
The tasks where helping an older relative with a phone or tablet usually begins.
Display settings usually let you increase the size of text and icons, and sometimes make the font bolder. Change things gradually and check readability: text that's too large gets in the way too, once it no longer fits on the screen.
Keep only what the person uses every day on the first screen: calls, messages, the camera, photos, video calls. Move the rest into a folder or onto the next screen, and don't delete anything without asking.
Ringer, call and notification volume are set separately, so check each one. Add the closest people to favorite contacts with photos, and figure out together how emergency calling works on your phone.
Turn on backup of photos and contacts to cloud storage, or agree to copy them to a computer from time to time. Explain why in plain words: if the phone gets lost, the grandkids' photos won't go anywhere.
Write down the phone passcode and the login details for important accounts on paper, and keep it in a safe place at home, not in the phone case. Check in advance how to recover access, and add a trusted contact if the system allows it.
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Settle on one messaging or calling app you both already have, and don't switch unless you have to. The fewer different options, the less confusion.
On the first call, the app will ask for permission to use the camera and microphone. Approve it together, in person or over a regular phone call, so the person understands what they're agreeing to.
Place the video calling app's icon somewhere easy to see on the first screen. If the app lets you pin your contact to the top of the list, do that too.
Call while you're nearby or connected on a regular line. Show how to answer a video call, how to turn on speaker and how to hang up, then ask them to do it on their own.
It helps when the light falls on their face instead of glaring from a window behind them, and the phone sits on a stand. Their hands are free, and the conversation doesn't turn into an endurance test.
A few lines in large letters: where the icon is, what to tap to answer and what to tap to hang up. A note next to the phone is more reassuring than any explanation.
What helps when you support an older relative: a paper cheat sheet, a phone stand, a charger by the bed, a tablet for video calls and a written list of numbers.
Phone, tablet or computer; helping in person, over the phone or with screen sharing; a paper cheat sheet, a video or a voice note — what works when.
No sound, text too small, a missing icon, a forgotten password, a video call that won't connect — and what to do when a parent calls in a panic.
Calls "from the bank," messages about "payments" and "gifts," requests for a code or to install an app — how to spot them and what to do.
Answers about this reference, about phones and service for an older person, and about protecting your family from phone scams without extra worry.
We write in general terms, based on our editorial understanding of the topic as of the date this page was prepared. Phone and tablet menus change from one version to the next, so look for the exact setting names on your own device, and for anything about an account or card, call your bank at its official number.